Associative Super Strengths (ASS) Syndrome

Everyone has a friend or someone they know that suffers from Associative Super Strengths (ASS) syndrome. You may have not realized up until this point but a lot of people that you deal with on a daily basis actually have some level of ASS that they are dealing with. Some go undiagnosed and most go untreated. The disease is so bad that these people usually end up with no friends because no one can stand to be around someone who suffers from ASS.

So how do you know if you have ASS?

It’s simple. People with ASS adopt mental and even physical strengths as their own just by association.

What does that mean?

It means if they know someone who is an olympic sprinter, then they think that by association, they know something about sprinting in the olympics. People with ASS substitute real actual experience and knowledge with just simply association.

You’re probably wondering how this affects you and if it’s contagious?

Luckily for you, ASS is actually really hard to catch. It takes long exposure to others with ASS to even have a chance to develop. Some people seem to foster an innate ASS gene in their DNA and are born that way, but for most of the people who suffer from ASS, it is something you develop.

It’s probably best to avoid people that you can clearly see suffer from ASS.

How do I tell if someone has ASS?

It’s simple. They infiltrate your hobbies and your professions. Their main goal is to devalue you while over valuing themselves. The goal is to make themselves seem more credible or to make themselves seem like a subject matter expert. People with ASS love attention and need to be heard. They have an innate desire for respect, whether they earn it or deserve it, they automatically will grant themselves that power (probably because they know someone respected) and they will try to assume a position of power over you.

Here are some examples of interaction with people who have ASS.

You are a runner and you just did your personal best time in a race, maybe you won the race, maybe you didn’t. All of a sudden you are approached by someone who says “hey good race, but you slouch to much when you run and you run off your heels” (This is the first step in starting to devalue you and your achievements)

So you say something along the lines of “Thanks, this is how I always have ran and when I’ve tried other methods, I didn’t do as well”

This is what they want to hear from you because their next line will be something along the lines of:

“Well, you probably didn’t do it right. If you were to do what I just said I think you’d do a lot better. I know, my friend was a professional runner.”

At this point, it’s time to walk away. You are dealing with an ASS. This person had the audacity to seriously tell you that they know something because of someone they know. It’s one thing to say I used to be a world class runner and I found this helped me out, but it’s a completely different level to just blatantly say they know what they are talking about by association with someone else.

If you do respond you can respond in a couple of ways. You can directly ask them if they have any experience running and how they did or you can tell them it sounds interesting and you’d be interested in meeting their friend. The key is to not give them any credibility that they actually know what they are talking about unless they can substantiate their claim.

Remember, their goal is to make themselves feel important by offering unsolicited advice as if they are some authoritative figure on the topic at hand. You’re the one out there running, don’t take any shit from anyone. If they haven’t had any running experience and they won’t introduce you to their friend, then it’s time to drop them like a bad habit and roll the fuck out because you’re dealing with someone who suffers from ASS.

Here’s another common example that’s probably happened to you.

You become sick one day and you run into a person, could be a friend, relative, or stranger. They start offering you health advice and then critiquing your eating and exercise habits. So you sit there and listen to them, and whether or not you agree, all of a sudden when they are done speaking and you look at them inquisitively, they tell you that their brother is a Doctor.

Well, you’ve just discovered why you may have felt uncomfortable with them. You might be dealing with an ASS so here’s a quick step to check.

Ask them if they trained or studied with their brother. If not, you have an ASS on your hand, if so then proceed to the next question.

Ask them under what areas, how long, and any other relevant things you can think of, perhaps even what area of study their brother is in.

You may find out that their brother is a Chiropractor or a Psychiatrist and the issue with you is that you have the flu. When that happens, you automatically want to be like, “well what the fuck” but you can’t be openly rude even though you’re dealing with an ASS.

If you discover they are indeed an ASS then walk away or you can just ask them again, “Sorry, I thought you said your brother was a doctor?”

They might say “oh yeah he is”

And you can follow up with “Yes, YOUR brother is a doctor, not you”

You can have all kinds of fun with ASS’s once you remove their credibility and knock them off their high horse, but do so at your own risk. Remember, some people truly haven’t and probably never will accomplish or learn anything on their own so they look for ways to interject in normal peoples lives with their unsolicited random facts and knowledge. You may find after conversation that they may have said something intelligent, but upon further exploration, you find out that they only had that one intelligent thing to say and that was the extent of their knowledge.

People who suffer from ASS come in many forms, so I hope this article helps in identifying them so you can live an ASS free life.