Pain and loss is something every person has to deal with in their own way. Some people deal with it head on, others over time, and some try to ignore it. Those that do not or cannot deal with it end up carrying around negative emotional energy. Scientists have proven that negative emotions can have a devastating effect on your overall health. It causes physical ailments such as chronic fatigue and tension in joints and muscles which can lead to more serious illnesses.
Having a lot of tension is like working out in the gym 24 hours a day 7 days a week, eventually you’re going to get sick, tired, and your body will give up. Long term, it’s definitely not good for you.
Instead of addressing the cause of the problem people have resorted to relaxation techniques, such as yoga, massage, meditation, and hot baths. These things distract your body, calm your mind, and release tension — but they are just treating symptoms of the problem and not the problem itself.
While some of these relaxation techniques will have a positive effect on you, most of it is temporary relief. It’s no different than taking ibuprofen for a headache, sure it can make your headache go away, but it doesn’t stop you from getting another one down the road.
Emotional issues are like the school bully, either face him straight on and make him think twice about bullying you or continuing taking the abuse while you try to avoid him. Unfortunately, most people are taking the abuse and trying to avoid the bully, so they always live with the fear of the bully in the back of their minds, they can never rest or be at peace.
Emotional baggage comes from many places. Most people get stressed at work so they frequent massages and hot baths, which you now know only addresses the symptoms, not the problem. These are just coping techniques like meditation, yoga, and so many other things that promote relaxation.
My solution is probably obvious at this point. In order to get rid of the emotional baggage, scarring, and pain — you have to address the root of the problem. You have take it head on and deal with it. That person, that scenario, that bully, that job, whatever is actually causing you the stress, you have to deal with it.
Sounds easier than it really is, I know. But the hunted must hunt the hunter.
You can spend your entire life running from the lion, or you can grab a gun and kill it instead. Yes, there’ll be another lion after you kill that one, but if you don’t take care of each one as it comes, that one lion will eventually turn into a pack, making them harder to kill and harder to run away. They will catch up to you eventually and force you to deal with them, it’s better you deal with your problems on your terms.
There’s help available for everything if you want it or face it alone, but make sure you face it. See a counselor, talk to a friend, try to make sense of it, and take the time to grieve — tears are weakness leaving the body.
A divorce, death, or simply losing time with a loved one can cause a lot of emotional pain — face it!
Don’t hide from your feelings, don’t try to get over it, don’t try to ignore it, seriously sit down and focus on the pain and how you feel. Feel it all for as long as it takes and deal with it. The more something hurts, the faster you’ll get over it, and it’s not that you’re “over it” it’s that you’ve already felt the pain, so there’s just nothing left to feel anymore. Eventually, you’ll just accept what happened as a fact of life and all the emotion will drift away from it.
That job, that coworker, that relative, or some other annoyance in your life — face it!
You may need to stand up to a bully, you may need to get uncomfortable and tell someone how you feel, you may need to quit your job, whatever it takes, do it. Don’t let it haunt you forever, even if something “goes away”, someone or something else will replace it — it’s a fact of life. The better you get at facing things the easier time you’ll have down the road.
This is the only way to become an emotionally stronger person.
Cry, break things, or sort it out in your mind. Whatever you do, don’t ignore it. You have to feel the pain, you have to feel what they feel, you have to feel what you feel — wear your heart on your sleeve but carry Wolverine’s claws, and be ready…be ready to stand your ground.
We don’t know what is coming through that door, but whatever it is, stand your ground. Do not run, do not hide, and do not fear. Stand strong and be strong.
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